The diaper lover side of people is unique and comes in different forms. The biggest problem most “pre” adult baby and diaper lovers have, especially at a young age, is coming to terms with their uniqueness. They realize that they like diapers and that they are somewhat attracted to using them in some way. But, they know that it is on some level, not normal. Then, most people wrestle with their inner-conscious for a long time because they enjoy something that to general society is taboo.
Lots of effort is spent trying to understand and make sense of why you are attracted to diapers in the beginning. Many people will go through phases of being a diaper lover and then ridding themselves of everything, only to return to diapers a week later. This is very common in the younger years for many adult babies and diaper lovers. They go through binge and purge sessions of using diapers and throwing them away.
In reality, most people that are at this point of liking diapers and using diapers in this way will find it extremely difficult to ever completely forget about their diaper lover side. In many cases, a lot of people will go years without using diapers but that thought is always there – almost haunting them and tempting them to come back. It is things like this that make you question why you should even wrestle with and trying to fight your diaper lover side. It is who you are at that point – it is part of you.
If you are one of those people that are wrestling with whether to accept the diaper lover side of yourself or not then you should step back and realize that if you are having to make that choice – then most times it is fruitless to even try. Accepting yourself for who you are is one of the best choices you are going to make. Accepting your diaper lover side is going to be a hard decision at first and I am sure you will question the choice at times but in the end you will realize it is for the best.
Being unique is something to be proud of. I am sure you asking me – how are you going to be proud of being a diaper lover in a society that looks at being an ABDL as taboo? That requires a little courage and bravery on your part to step out of your shell. But, also you have to tell yourself that the uniqueness in being an adult baby or diaper lover is what keeps you happy, comfortable, and makes you, YOU. This is important for your overall sanity and functioning. If it helps you focus and get through your day and keeps you happy – that is important too. You only have one life to live and if you spend it not doing something you enjoy and wishing a lot of the time you could or should have allowed the diaper lover side of you to come out.
Be yourself, be unique and be proud of who you are. Accept your inner diaper lover side and then move on with your life.
Took me years to realize this. I’m 45 years old and I am a proud diaper lover. You’re not hurting anyone and you’re not breaking the law, so put your diaper on, wet your pants and be happy.
Gordon, i’m 40and a hall and i’m a proud diaper wearer.
Hi Ericklydiaperman2. I agree. I’m 41 yrs old and I wear diapers. I don’t need them for medical purposes, nor is there a fetish about them. 🙂
I totally agree. I’ve been struggling with my interest in diapers from the time I was a boy. By the time I was an adult, I’ve decided just to accept my interest. I’ve decided that it’s a waste of time or sanity, trying to understand why I’m so interested in wearing diapers. That’s like trying to figure out why one is gay or lesbian while others are straight. It’s just is what it is. We might as well accept it. We don’t have to like it, but to try to understand why it is is just a waste of time.
Excellent words of wisdom!
I agree.
🙂
I’ve had people ask me why I like wearing diapers so much. And I have no explanation to make. Even if I could explain it, they wouldn’t understand. So I just say “I just do. Don’t try to understand it. I know I don’t understand it.” If I tried to understand it, I’d go crazy.
Adrian,
All I can say is thank you for your words of wisdom. I have been trying to figure out why I like diapers my whole life. I think I know why I do but I won’t get into it here. You have helped me to understand this side of me. By the way, do you have a degree in psychology? If not, you should. Again, thank you for your posts.
This will probably only apply to Christians, but it was a part of my journey.
Part of acceptance is recognizing why we feel guilt. A lot of the guilt comes from a western repressive attitude towards sexuality and a feeling of guilt in thinking that somehow this is sinful because it is not part of the normal culture. There seems to be an idea that taboo automatically is sin.
I went to seven years of seminary, 4 years for B.A, In religious Education and 3 years for a Master in Divinity, During that time I wrestled with this desire and came to some conclusions for myself.
1. Binge and Purge – It happened a lot, cost me a lot of money and ended causing distractions as I would earnestly desire my diapers when I purged.
2. Is it sinful – Anything that takes you away from God is sinful, but did it have to? How does wearing a diaper take me away from my God? It really doesn’t.
3. Is it sexual- Diapers were never a sexual stimulant to me as I became interested in them as a little boy. Because it is not sexual it does not pull me away from my spouse.
4. Am I an AB- I met with some AB’s in person and was told that every DL eventually becomes AB, but ten years after that meeting I don’t think that is true. I am not interested in babyness at all. I don’t want to role-play, drinking from bottles, etc. It is only the diaper that interests me.
5. Is it normal – Absolutely not. Stating one likes diapers is not ever going to be perceived as normal. One can like diapers better than alternatives. One can grow to depend on diapers, but it is not normal to seek it out.
6. Can I quit this- No. I have tried so many times, and I came to the conclusion that it will always be there.
So I realized I have to make this life work in the best way possible while still accomplishing my personal goals.
While this not sexual to me, exploring ones sexuality is not a bad thing 🙂 While I don’t identify with AB culture I also don’t see that as a problem. Fundamentalist wack-jobs might judge, but they miss a lot of things in the Bible… particularly the “not judging” aspect of Christianity and loving all people regardless of whether they agree with you or share your own view.
I truly hope that all DL’s can take Adrian’s advice on accepting their differences as a unique aspect of who they are 🙂
ALso, Adrian, I wonder if you have more pics of you wearing clothes as a practical DL? I really like the pic of you in your jeans. The pics of just the diapers are nice, but it would be nice for you to show us some pictures with just the lip of the diaper or some pictures that show you can be fashionable and wear diapers as a woman.
I feel that way because my wife is dealing with OAB and she has had some accidents, but says she could never wear a diaper, no matter how thin because it would be obvious. She doesn’t know I am a DL, so I am not at a point to point her here because my bladder issues are seen as something I have accepted in my own way and she is in partial denial of her bladder issues, especially when she becomes pregnant because the extra pressure will certainly make her bladder problems worse… It would be nice to show her that in the event she has to wear diapers (which I think will be a real possibility during pregnancy) that she can still be pretty, fashionable and active.
Thanks for all you do Adrian for making incontinent people see life can be active, full, and happy!
PS. I apologize if my Christian thoughts offend any of the readers of the blog. I am certainly not trying to push my beliefs on anyone, but like my diapers, my Christianity is part of who I am and I am not ashamed of that.
I’m not offended by the religious references. I’m Jewish, so while I respect a Christian’s wish to believe what he/she will, I don’t celebrate the same holidays. I would also like to see more pictures of Adrian wearing diapers. While there’s nothing wrong with the Premium Content, it costs money to view them, money I don’t have. So any photos of you wearing diapers, onesies, plastic pants, etc., I’d like to see them. Thanks. 🙂
Thank you Diaperwill I am a Christian too .
That’s good to hear. It’s the same for me as well. 🙂
Hi Diaperwill,
No, your thoughts are not just Christian…I have thrown out hundreds of dollars of diapers over the years. When it was a fetish…sure. I felt guilty when I was chastised for wearing diapers when I didn’t need them. I threw away cases of diapers sometimes. As far as sexual…I used to get off on it and ‘relieve pressure’ in a used diaper. I’m not an AB, I know diapers are not normal…however, I got a surprise and now I am incontinent. Due to nerve damage from stenosis and spondylothesis I wet at night and leak badly during the day hence I wear something 24/7. So now, it’s medical.
However, you did a good self-inventory and I commend you for your diligence. Not many would do that. Some wear out of laziness (can’t be interrupted to pee) or comfort (can’t always make it to the bathroom). I know both sides of the spectrum…wearing for plewp_e and necessity.
As a recommendation, have your wife try Depend underwear for women. I wear them during the day (for men of course) and they are unnoticeable. Especially the new style. The Silhouettes are good too but more expensive. My wife uses them during heavy cycles. Offer to wear them with her for solidarity :). Keeping your desires a secret isn’t a good thing. Let them out and she will probably accept her OAB better and manage it properly :).
Take care,
Colin
Another insightful and great post. I could really relate to much of it. I grew attached to diapers having to wear them as a child and remember at some point gaining very strong feelings toward my diapers and not wanting to give them up. I was a an ABDL and didn’t understand my feelings and emotions – I just wanted to return to being diapered. Fortunately my mom obliged on numerous occasions due to my IBS, but I still wanted more. As a teenager, I yearned for diapers and finally began wearing them again when I was in college. As an adult, I went through the binge and purge cycles with my diapers and felt very different because of my attachment to wearing and using diapers. It wasn’t until the Internet that I discovered I was not alone and connected to the ABDL community. Over time I have accepted myself as a diaper lover and adult baby (more about the diapering and treated little than about other baby things). I met ABDL friends and had a few wonderful mommies that celebrated and enjoyed my little side. I would wear diapers 24/7 if I could get away with it at work and in the vanilla world without detection, but I don’t dare try at this point. Loving diapers is my business and I am not ready to share with others that don’t understand and would judge me harshly. My career and reputation would suffer unintended consequences that are unnecessary. Alas, I will continue to practice my lifestyle in private, but am happy being me – diapers and all.
Thanks Adrian, I wish I had this type of information when I was young. I spent so much time thinking that I must be the strangest boy in the world because I wanted to wear a diaper and feel like a baby. When I think of all the things that I threw away to try and rid myself of this. When I did finally just accept it all of the guilt and bad feelings went away. So what if I wear a diaper and occasionally have a bottle of milk at night, I’m a pretty good person
I know the feeling. I wish I had something like this when I was a boy who liked diapers. I thought I was a freak!
There was some serious self guilt huh
Hey Nicky. I agree. These days, I’m not as self-conscious about my diapers as I used to be. I don’t try to let them show, but I’m not going to hide them either.
I agree Jason, I won’t show them off, but I won’t hide them either.
Hey Paul. Indeed. I didn’t know anyone older than 2 yrs old who wore diapers, much less liked wearing diapers. I wish this website existed when I was growing up.
Which is why for me, I accepted wearing diapers as a pair of underwear and short shorts. Diapers for me are part of my life and make my life less stressful as well
I’ve been following this blog for a few years now and this in my first interaction. Here it goes. Me and my wife are in the midst of getting personal professional counseling because she cheated on me with another guy. In a nut shell I’ve come to terms with the fact that I like diapers but she has not. In fact the real reason that she cheated was because she had a hard time finding me attractive or dealing with my diaper fetish so she went and found “love” from some one else. Some one “normal.” I still love her very much but in order to make our marriage work I need to basically ignore my interest in diapers. Which sucks cause they’re apart of who I am but I love her more. It’s tough. Any thoughts or wisdom?
This is going to be a very hard aspect for your marriage. Counseling will be good but she is going to have to accept you for whom you are or you will likely resent her for not being able to be your inner self. I am fortunate to have a wife that is accepting a celebrates my diapers and participates in age play. Keep me posted.
It’s not easy for people who aren’t into diapers to accept. You’ll just have to be patient with them. They may eventually get involved, they may never want to get involved. They may think “this is too weird!” or “this is sick! Who would get into things like diapers and peeing in them, or pooping in diapers?” or “why?” It’s just how some people are.
Like many people out there I was/had a normal childhood and was potty trained at the age of 1 & 1/2 to 3years of age.
I didn’t have a diaper lover side to me until I turned 8 years old/young in 1988 8 years after being a baby/infant when I re-discoverd my stash of pampers toddler plus diapers which my mum kept under my bunk bed, I did experiment with puttin on the diapers and acting like a baby again.
But once I turned 9 this side of me seemingly died or went dormant and those thoughts went away but ever-since being diagnosed with a OAB/ weak bladder in 2010 I have been wearing diapers in my late 30’s I am now around 35 years old/young.
I don’t see any problem with the fact I wear diapers and enjoy the comfort and protection provided by them and I’ll be honoust I feel younger again by wearing them at least pycalogically speaking, I also simply don’t worry about what other people might think of me any more as I have my own life to live and I simply ignore the stigmatizum attached to this subject.
At first the idea of wearing diapers again was totally alien to me and scared me half to death, although given most of my fears where unfounded I have accepted my new life as per the previous statements mentioned above.
I have also found or discoverd a shop since last year that I can buy my diapers from without the fear of being in an embarrassing situation as it specializes for people like me who have disabilities and although I didn’t mention it earlier I have life-long disabilities in the form of high functioning Autism and other problems caused by nerve damage from when I had epilepsy earlier in my life.
As per my previous stories this website and sorry if any of this is repeated but its essentially my story and nobody else’s so all I can hive is a honoust reply to your comments.
I recently got back from a long vacation in the far-east mostly spent in the Philippines and Hong Kong and got the chance to buy some adult diapers whilst I was over there and I will review them at a later date so stay tuned.
But I must go to work soon so I will be in touch in the near future so until then it’s good bie
As ever
Kwan Ming
It’s the same with me. I was out of diapers at the usual age of around 2 yrs. I then wore cloth training pants until the age of either 5 or 6. Even after I was finally out of diapers, I started wearing diapers, this time in secret.
Hi guys, thank you for all these posts, I have been really struggling with this for years. I can for a long stretch not wanting diapers but then I’ll be driving to work and the next think in pops the diaper thoughts, I have scolded myself over it many times. Just recently I started wearing home made diapers from old towels etc. I enjoyed the feeling of wetting myself in them. Yesterday for the first time in about two years I went and bought some disposable diapers. I’m in one right now. When I got them home and opened the packet I got so excited. I had to put one on straight away. I have forgotten how nice disposables are. They are so discreet. I am still trying to accept myself with this love of diapers but my problem is being able to tell my wife about it. I feel that telling will help me to accept this love of diapers.
I am a dedicated Christian and have struggled with loving diapers and being a c
Christian. I have always thought is was a sin and satan is attacking me. I think I have come to terms with this parts and feel happier now.
I still think there is something wrong with me. I have spent hours and hours trying to find out why I love diapers. But haven’t come up with anything solid. It is very true how this can torment you. It is horrible. Since putting on my disposable diaper again I do feel better and happier. I even went to see a client this morning without an issue.
Well I will continue working on accepting myself with this love of diapers and hopefully one day be able to tell my wife.
I think it’s a lifelong process, that may never end. I’m 41 yrs old and I’m still trying to figure out why I like diapers. I don’t need them for medical reasons, nor do I consider myself an Adult Baby or Diaper Lover. I don’t know just what it is.
Thank you Adrian. You are a nice girl.
We are a Christian couple. My husband loves to wear pull ups (diapers) to bed. I found it awful and disturbing at first and I don’t understand it but now I encourage it. It’s who he is and he seems to get comfort and plewp_e from it. He doesn’t use them he uses the toilet. He just likes the feel. I don’t want him to feel bad or freaky I want him to feel happy and loved for who he is. Enjoying wearing diapers isn’t affecting any one else and its harmless. If he wanted to go in them I would stand by him. I am happy if he is happy.
I told my parents about my interest in diapers, and while my dad didn’t mind it, my mom didn’t. She couldn’t understand how, or why, anyone would want to wear diapers and use diapers. I ended up telling her “don’t try to understand it. All it’ll do is drive you crazy! I don’t understand it myself.”
Dear michele, I would love to talk to you, I am struggling with the wierdnesss of my husband wantingto wear diapers. We have been married nearly a year and he told me about them before we got married but said he had stopped. He even promised recently never to bring it up again. well somthing sparked it and he and I had a huge argument over it. It weird me out.. and groses me out so much. I dont want it to turn into something bigger. After a while I got frustrated and just bought him some and told him to put one on. He didnt and I tried telling him it wouldnt be an awkward thing but just to do it. and he did the next morning when I was away at school. I felt so freaked out that he had actually done it.. and so soon. I was disgusted and skipped class and came home and told him I wanted a divorce because it was too much.Its been rough the past copule days. I dont know if I should actually accept this or..if I should help him quit. We are LDS christians and I dont know if it is a sin or not. Help?
Dear Sister. I understand you. I felt repulsion to start with but then I wanted my husband to be true to himself. When he wore them he became a lot less stressed. I started to encourage him to see how far he would go with what I see as a harmless fetish. It started with him breastfeeding. That was weird then for a joke I said I would put a diaper on him. He was ecstatic about the idea and I was totally freaked out. BUT I never let him know. I love him for who he is. Strange thing is he has just decided he doesn’t want anything to do with them any more. We will see. He wanted to give up breast feeding but he is addicted to that. Don’t divorce your husband. Accept him for who he is and let him be happy and fullfilled. It will be both your secret and your marriage will be closer for it. You may never approve of his diaper fetish but allow him to be the man that he is without him having to feel guilty. Love him unconditionally.
All the best.
I agree. You don’t have to like it. You don’t have to agree with it. But you can’t just abandon him, or divorce him. He’s your partner, your husband. You should at least accept it and participate as much as you can.
UPDATE: VEry soon my husband missed his diapers and I discovered he was wearing one to bed. Half the problem being the Velcro comes undone when he turns over in bed. He has since thrown them out. He won’t wear any thing with plastic or rubber as he says it makes him sweat so the old fashioned diapers didn’t work because he wouldn’t wear plastic pants with them which would have helped keep them in place and he doesn’t like disposable pull ups because of the plastic lining. Now I have bought him double layer terry towelling pants. He wears them most nights and is cosy and comfortable in them all night long. One happy husband.
Yep he’s back in them. Wasn’t long before I found him wearing one to bed.
A sin… how could it be a greater sin than divorce? I don’t believe this violates any aspect of divine law… however, I am no authority on that. Does this interfere with his relationship with god? Harm other people? I don’t really understand wanting to wear diapers without need either. but there are a lot of things I don’t understand about my wife (she doesn’t wear diapers but she does a lot of things I still don’t understand) Have you asked him why he wants to do this? What event occurred that made him became interested? Take this opportunity to learn a deeper element about your spouse before you pass judgement.
I have to wear diapers. I have come to accept this. I hope that in the big scheme of things, it is a minor part. I have loved my wife for nearly 20 years. I am glad she did not divorce me over this one thing… We have shared so many good things together.
I fail to see how it can be a sin to God. You already love your partner, and you also love God.
This post is beautiful and inspirational. We should all be happy with who we are.
I totally agree with you. I’ve never understood why the stigma associated with diapers.
I’ve been through the entire diaper lover acceptance process over the last couple of years. At first, total rejection of the notion that I really loved to wet. Then some surge incontinence occurred, so wearing protection (pads during the day) I accepted. But it was at night when I was still struggling with wearing and wetting a diaper that was causing me to question whether this was “right” or not. Once I realized I could get a much better night’s sleep wearing a diaper, the angst began to assuage. And wearing one and thoroughly wetting it while watching TV alongside my now very accepting wife, became blissful!
Accepting that I am a bonified diaper lover (not an AB), has made my life so much more stress free. I so look forward to my first wetting as I fall asleep and even more so to the last couple of prolific wets as I awake in a very soaked, soft and squishy diaper. Wetting in most of its forms is simply wonderful. I even wet in a pair of soft cotton panties this morning…
I agree with all your sayin it is a comfort thing makes for a good nite sleep
My girlfriend and I are struggling with this right now, like some of you are in previous posts. Before meeting me she had no idea of the kinkier side of life. She was very vanilla and never explored or push boundaries. I admitted to her after a few months of dating that I wear diapers and use them. I told her I’ve fantasized about her wearing them, using them, about her changing me and then I would return the favor. A year later we’re still talking about it. She accepts it, but has yet to have anything to do with it. It’s really hard for both of us for different reasons. I have difficulty because I’ve been outcast, shunned, stigmatized, and made fun of in the past, so there is a lot of hurt, guilt, and shame, yet through it all the desire to wear and be accepted and to SHARE it — that’s very important to me — with someone else, remains.
She is having issues with it, like sister and michelle who posted earlier, because she doesn’t understand it, and it doesn’t turn her on or have any positive effect for her. She wants to be supportive, she wants me to be able to be who I am and not have to repress this, but she is still having a hard time with it. So we’re on opposite sides of the coin. I’m actually seeing a sex therapist to get a better understanding of it, and also in an effort to lovingly and respectfully incorporate it into our relationship. If I had my way, I’d be diapered by her, wetting/messing without fear of judgement, and being lovingly changed by her. I would also like to experience doing the same for her. Will it happen? Due to past angst and depression and negative reactions from friends and family, I tend to lean toward the “never” viewpoint. Ugh.
This is tough for both parties. Sometimes I feel it would be easier to just break it off, and search for someone who is liked minded in this regard. I’m sure that would just bring a different set of problems though. I don’t understand my desire for diapers, but i know that they turn me on, they give me a sense of security and comfort, and I feel calmer when I’m diapered. To share with my girlfriend, to me, would be blissful. I’m very happy that there are couples who can share this, like Adrian and Peter. You are both blessed. To change each other is such an intimate and loving thing to do for one another. It must be amazing 🙂
I refuse to wear them. My husband has suggested it in the past. Its his thing not mine. He after several years is off them at the moment but admits he may want to wear them now and again. I think he tries hard at times to give his baby ways up but he can’t. I am pleased when I think he’s over his fetishes but then they rear up again. I know they are who he is. He has a problem accepting it sometimes. He is a wonderful husband and I love him dearly. I wouldn’t want to change him.
It will always be a part of him — you say you don’t want to change him, which is awesome, but do you think if you accept this part of him he may sleep easier so to speak? He will never get completely over it. I’m just curious, not judging anyone at all here, but what is your turn off about it? Could you do it occasionally to make him happy — basically be uncomfortable for a bit to do something you know he likes? I’m just thinking out loud, that’s all 🙂
Who knows, when you are in your old age you may find you have to wear them! (I know my dad did and my grandparents did)
I agree. My grandmother wore diapers until she passed away in 2011 at age 92 yrs.
Me wearing them is not an option. Its a definite no. The thought makes me feel sick. If I have to in the future due to incontinence then so be it. I have long since accepted this side of him. I was just happy when he said he didn’t want that side of life anymore. But of course it’s reared its head again. He didn’t know I was pleased. When I discovered
His baby ways slowly returning I think he was struggling with himself a bit so I said to him a couple of days ago that people who choose not to wear their diapers usually find after a while or even a long time that they feel the need to begin again so we will keep them just in case he has the desire to put one on. He’s happy with that. He knows he has my support.
Understood 🙂 Glad you accept him, that’s huge. The best to you both, it’s not easy sometimes!
R u understanding an let him do it around u ? It’s been 2 years my wife found out !!she still don’t understand &expects me to quit ,not that I don’t want to I’ve already tried several times ,got upset an went rate back to it cause it comforts me !!! Like when I was a kid cause my damb mom mentally abused me ! As long as I wear it keeps me calm an happy !!!
Some Times I discover he is wearing his double thickness terry pants to bed. we call them his diaper. To relax him I say things like “Thats a good boy” so he knows its fine to do so. I don’t hate them anymore. Use to them. He goes through spells of wanting to wear them. Sometimes long spells without. Either way ok by me. Sometimes I sense he needs to wear one and I will mention that he should put one on for bed. He seems to be relieved that he can put one on. We have experienced a pet death this week so I have his nappy pants ready on the bed. He will need their comfort at a time like this.
I’m 14 and after 14 years i’ve finally accepted my diaper loving side and i will wear diapers for the rest of my life!
I am 38, I have been wearing diapers on and off for 20 years now. I have recently been more consistent in wearing them and using them. I tried to in a way turn it off. But it is a part of my life and I enjoy it. I am getting comfortable with the fact I am a diaper lover. Thank you for sharing your story.